Member-only story
Shannon Ashley has me on Medium again
A couple of years ago I wrote 50 or so pieces on Medium. Gained a thousand followers. Earned a few hundred pounds. Then I deleted the whole lot.
Why did I do this? You see, the thing is, I am a writer. I nearly said ‘I want to be’ a writer. But I am a writer. I do make my living mostly from writing. But it’s a different type of writing. I write educational content, teacher resources, and reading books for children. It’s client writing. I adore writing but …
… I have a huge issue with personal writing. The kind of writing I tried to do on Medium before. The kind of writing that Shannon Ashley is so bloody brilliant at. Thank goodness for her because she’s inspired me to come back here and try again.
The last stint I did on here was under a different name. Writing under my own name makes me feel vulnerable and exposed. It also makes me feel narcissistic. Then comes out the self-loathing and embarrassment. Hang on, writing under a different name made me feel all these things too. That’s why I ended up deleting the lot. I looked back and cringed. You’re trying too hard; your writing isn’t good quality; who cares what you have to say; people are judging you.
And yet I’m back. Under my real name. It makes my heart beat a little fast as I type.
